Posted in #askjaxasms, @jaxasms, useless

an irony – a sarCastony – a couple pictures – and some notsomuch nice words


Let’s get it started with a bit of a summary? If not a summary – a possible, maybe probable, an onomatopoeia.

your an idiot

**millions and millions on that internet thing all the kids are buzzing about

onomatopoeia (LOOK AT ALL THOSE VOWELS!) – definitely irony. On all of the social medias i partake in, including reputable blogs and websites, you (me) find that exact statement. Word for every three words of idiocy. see the irony in there?

Hint: it’s YOU’RE not your – (snark*)

Pro-Tip: as you read – HEAR it in the biggest sarcastic voice you can imagine*

jacK

Onward and upward – actually downward but…

the dead dog and donKey award! if you are sarCastic – or you know a masTersarCaster – show me the stuff – I’ll show up with the award.

A new self portrait
Not a selfie

This ditty was made by someone else and contributed over there on the twitter – @jaxasms

QUITE A FEW more! Cept the two jaXasms items that i made – the others are all submitted by readers like you! The shoes are MINE! Only the best dress/sports/casual shoes EVER made!

And LASTERLY superheroes and characters on the toilet! JUST WHAT YOU WANTED RIGHT?

Posted in #askjaxasms, @jaxasms, wizDumbs

sheet cake baby! [old guy still learnen stuff¿]


As you already know – i readily admit when i am wrong, or don’t know something – I’m just very bluntly matter-of-fact. As such (yes that’s how you say it)

I learned a new term today – accidentally – but it was new. For those of you who already KNEW this term – it was happenstance that i happened upon it. It was a public radio show talking about baking. The host either said the term or said something close and it piqued my interest. AKA my slightly heightened OCD and ADD. ALL those acronyms! For those in the need to know (like me)

Back on topic! The term is this: ‘Sheet Cake’ The UrbanDictionary.com definition of sheet cake (if you don’t want to follow the link) is this:

Sheet cake aka San Francisco Sheet Cake (aside from the baking definition) is when a heterosexual guy has sex with a heterosexual woman and the pair is sandwiched between two homosexual men. Are you getting the picture here? A LOT of sex is happening in that picture!

I will just leave my new knowledge there – Do with it what you see fit. If it was a good idea for you – happy San Francisco Sheet Caking!

Posted in #askjaxasms, a post maybe?

Another conspiracy theory surrounding the Covid pandemic has risen to life like a medical-grade Frankenstein


OTTAWA – Doctors and the Canadian Government made a sweetheart ‘vaccine deal’ — APPARENTLY to save the lives of millions of conspiracy theory surrounding a secret vaccine oath between Canadian doctors and the government has been confirmed, revealing medical professionals are pushing vaccinations in order to save your life.

According to Yellowit user @I_M_Alberta_born_baby, the conspiracy was unearthed after he held his new Vaccination card up to a bright light and discovered a hidden symbol: the smirking purple devil emoji. ‘😈’

“Canadian doctors were forced by the government to FORCE the public to get the LIFE-SAVING vaccinations or else they’d lose their jobs,” His Yellowit post went on, “Want proof? My friend Wayne’s brother’s girlfriend knows things. She listens to podcasts and reads stuff!”

There was something else about a snake and glad bagged chicken wings – but i nodded off and the screen timed out.

“I feel like we’ve been caught with our hands in the cookie jar,” said Doctor Bernadette Tubbs, who admitted to making the deal in a dark alley behind a hospital after she just finished doing back-to-back 24 hour shifts intubating 40-year-old covid patients.

“Now that Canadians know about our nefarious intentions to try and save people’s lives -“ Tubbs continued “ And save those lives through vaccinations, there is nothing we can do to retain anybody’s trust.”

In speaking with anti-vaxxer Katelyn Kalio, the mom of 6 told me that doctors are evil and should be in jail. “Why would I put foreign stuff in my body? [quick question Mrs Kalio – how did those 6 children get borneded? Whether by sex or by test-tube, SOMETHING foreign was put inside your body. THAT statement of yours, therefore, is patently FALSE.

Kalio finished by stating angrily, “We SHOULD be using the much talked about, on Facebook, drug Ivermectin. It’s at least proven to work deworming cows and horses alike. Good for them – SHOULD be good for you too.”

And with that I had to stop the interview and do what the former American president suggested and drink some bleach, followed by a healthy eye and ear rinse.

And just to add some more learning! Frankenstein was NOT the monster’s name. The dude that made him was Frankenstein, and the monster was named Frankenstein’s Monster. So there’s that.

Posted in #askjaxasms, sar-kast-inks.

So this thing kinda happened…


It’s the Sunday, Holy day? As usual I fell out of bed at 4am and my intentions said it was a day of writing – the book and stories HERE.

©️jacK @4am rolling out of the coffin

It’s 5 now. 5PM specifically. Day GONE! Lots of *new music on the playlists listening – and that damned rabbit-hole – NOT the sarCast – but that internet thing. And for YOU this evening then…A recap of my wasted day! Fun right? HELLS TO THE YEA! Ya.
A bit of a longer post BC fotos? Ha. Optional I hear. Anyway… All aboard the trainwreck…

First stop THIS:

©️obviously the english is optional

There are a few stops in that – whatsitagain? Yea covid I think it was. Well is – I don’t talk about it here SAVE TODAY as I found gems like all these. How this will work – just a Sunday night wander with jacK’s brain!

©️ like i said – a few like this

Human’s have appeared to have forgotten what it is to human.

©️ in case you were wondering – everyone was wearing a mask.
©️ moving right along. Yelp is IN public toilets now
©️ a long sign… but worth the read!
©️ and then i laughed and laughed and i laughed