Tag: just_jax_stories

No PG Scavenger Hunt

Over the course of this pandemic, one little thing I noticed was the extents to which online teachers have gone to keep kids interested in online learning. This got my sometimes childish brain thinking about one of the activities they partooken in. A (various topics) scavenger hunt event was VERY popular with the children, and also popular with educators looking for *new* ways to teach the very often ADHD kids science or math.

The last feature I saw was a scavenger hunt for coloured, and various shaped objects in the children’s’ bedrooms. So I thought, OF COURSE, of an adult version of such a project.

So – HERE IT IS! I don’t care WHAT you find in your homes, but I want to hear about what you DID FIND! Whether or not you have roommates or family in your place I want you to scavenge! Not colours or shapes the ONLY criteria I present to you is that it MUST be an item that you keep/store in a hidden like place. A drawer, cupboard, toilet tank, bedside table – a spot that if you had guests in your home – would be hidden from sight.

Whatever is in those places – Tell me what it/they is/are. For fun! TAKE A PICTURE and send it to me! If you wish to remain anonymous – say so in your letter. I’ll only use FIRST names and NO PICS of YOU!

Dial it up! I want to know the TRUTH! Let’s KEEP it on an adult level as not many children frequent a website about SARCASM and DOUBLE/TRIPLE ENTENDRES. Just NOT their thing. I’ll post your photos unless there is something ILLEGAL in them, and I WILL NOT report ANY stories to authority-like figures.

Let’s have some FUN! Send all your details to jaxasms@icloud.com and then watch here for ALL the entertainment I am sure we’ll muster!

HOPEFULLY be forewarned!

sapiophile, sapiosexual, and the Unique Art of Stupidity.

A sapiophile is someone who is attracted to intelligence or intelligent people. This attraction can be romantic, friendship, and/or sexual.

A sapiosexual person is someone who finds intelligence ‘sexually’ attractive.
And sapiophiles are generally intelligent themselves.

Nearly EVERY TIME I hear or read sapiosexual, or see or hear somebody talking about that or sapiophile – they are getting it wrong. Sort of like ‘they’re and their and there.’ Only worse.

Anyway…over there on the twitter – some SERIOUSLY use the app like a dating site as he mentions below. And I was reading this guy’s twitter bio thing – and this is a portion what it said:

wait – PRO-tip. One without a law degree would think that the tweets (once you tweet them,) become public domain – but NOPE – if you TWEET it – it’s all yours for like 160 years or something. Squirrel! Rabbit! Anyway…If you did not ‘get’ what I just said — No worries – it can be left up there and basically forgotten. It’s only a PRO-tip if you are sapio and you really, REALLY, care.

The bio: “I am a sapiopile. If your a sapiophile too im your man. I like you educated and wise beyond youre years. This isn’t a dating profile so lets talk about something else. Like my funny tweets!”

Originally somewhere on the Twitter.com

Honestly…my head exploded again writing that. It just keeps popping! So one last head explode as we talk the profile.

As defined up at the top – sapiophile – sorta-like intelligent‽ !?

DUDE. For an intelligent guy looking for an intelligent grrrl, and a girl…one of you is an idiot – and we’ve heard NOTHING from her. THUS Mr. Sapio…. do the math. Your little blurb up there one part at a time. You spelled ‘sapiophile’ WRONG. You spelled ‘your’ WRONG. Missed the comma after too. Spelled ‘I’m’ WRONG. AGAIN spelled ‘your’ WRONG. Spelled ‘let’s’ WRONG.

DUDE. For an intelligent guy…You’re an idiot. Idiot.

ask me. Anything – ask jaxasms

I put out the call here and over on the twitter for some #askjaxasms questions. An Ask Me Anything sort thing.


I got a couple questions so here they are. For the most part I will leave names out unless you ask me to use them. Kinda the ‘reverse’ of how it’s usually done – but this isn’t so much usual is it? Look at me asking YOU questions! OK, I will move along. YOUR questions.

1. I am reading a book about Anne Frank. Wondering why she was hiding when she could have left a long time before? -Anonymous

Well Anonymous. Really? How the hell should I know? I know that I SAID ask me ANYTHING – but this century would be good? Please?

2. Hey jax! After spending his quarantine days on his phone and twitter, my husband has it in his mind that he and I should be having sex anally. Why and should I do it? -Kalley. (She asked me to use her name)

Anyway…Kalley. On your husband’s mind. Ummm yea? It’s probably the only place he has yet to stick his… (Penis for the under 18’s)so yea he thinks about it. I hear it’s fun – so use LOTS of lube and DO IT! Anal is most guys’ Everest. The forbidden conquest. That’s IT. That’s why he wants to. If he were to “talk” about it BEFORE the act – or have you draw a picture of the act or have you explain what happens ‘down there’ that it’s NOT rainbows, lollipops, and fruit juice rain showers. USUALLY you’d head off any further talk (except that empty ‘dirty’ talk) after having THAT HONEST conversation but – again because he has NOT done it before and is NOT in the same galaxy as reality – he’ll ‘plod along.

So Kallie – thanks.


Survivors’ Remorse

I wish I’d…

A long post – where it usually isn’t. I had composed a long diatribe about the selfish among us. It was saddening, it was remorseful, and it was straight out the rib-box – the heart shaped box. So WHY am I not writing that version of this post? Because friends, because it, like me today, IT was filled with anger, with hate, with me screaming into the void that I shouldn’t HAVE to remember. If you want to read that version of the post…Shoot me an email jaxasms@icloud.com let me know WHY you want to read my anger. Or don’t. Doesn’t matter cause I’ll send it to you anyway. It hurts. Instead I am just riffing. Here it is, off-the-cuff.

Hold your family, friends, almost-friends, and notsomuch friends close. Call them. Often. And if you can’t ACTUALLY hold them – Call ‘em again! Now dammits. WAY beyond what you think mights be too much/many.

What was long – I just riffed in half and more. My hug: For every eye reading this, please accept it – My only ask in return for this free virtual hug – is to PASS IT ON! A relatively easy ask – SO THAT YOU don’t have to say the words that I am saying today and tonight and probably a LONG time to come.

I wish I’d…